What's Our Vocation?

The last four weeks in our writing course we've been working on a paper, taking it through different stages. This is my final copy. Hope you enjoy.

P.S. I'd love constructive criticism and comments. =)

In today's culture, even amongst Christian young ladies, there is a shocking lack of intentionality in daily life between high school and marriage. This raises the question, what should occupy a lady's time post graduation? In the intervening time between high school graduation and marriage, a young lady to begin preparing for the next season of life; learning new skills, being competent in household responsibilities, furthering her education, and continually striving to become more like Christ. Whether a young lady is headed to college, "waiting" until God calls her to marriage, or perhaps never marries, all of these endeavors are useful and well worth gaining. "If she desire a good, worthy husband she had better use no art, but simply be her own natural self. Let her cultivate the powers of her mind, engage in good and useful work, both within and without the home, study to acquire practical knowledge of domestic affairs, and trust that, if it is most expedient, for her, God, the best Maker, of marriages, will send a husband of her choice."

Learning skills such as sewing, cooking, hospitality, budgeting, and decorating are an excellent use of time. The list is endless, a young lady could never run out of useful, practical skills to add to her résumé. Such dexterity would be of great benefit to a young lady and her family, both before and after marriage. Young women often see the teen and early years before matrimony as years that can be devoted to pleasure and leisure. This, however, is a false view of their purpose. Every stage of life should be spent with the next season in view, not to the extent that we ignore today's duty, but having a vision of what our calling is. Women are best suited and ready for marriage if they have spent time and thought preparing for what may lie ahead. As Mr. Knightley says in Jane Austen's Emma, "men of sense, whatever you may chose to say, do not want silly wives."

Becoming competent in household responsibilities is an accomplishment in and of itself. Being capable, not only of individual skills, but also knowing how to piece them together and run a home, is entirely different. Balancing your time between laundry, cleaning, preparing meals, and the numerous other daily tasks involved in keeping a home running smoothly, is no easy chore. If a young lady has experience or even expertise in this area, how much easier will it be for her to transition from her father's home into that of her husband. She will find it easier to incorporate other endeavors that come her way such as teaching and training children, and ministering to friends, neighbors, and church family.

Furthering one's education is not black and white. Reading great literature, searching out new things, staying up-to-date on current events, having discussions and debates with others, listening to great speakers, and going to college are a few of the numerous ways to broaden the mind. Though the focus of a woman's attention centers around the home, a sharp mind and well rounded education is vital in the home life. Certainly there is no wife who does not enjoy discussing current events, books, politics, life, etc. with her husband and children; how much more intelligently will she be able to do so if she has cultivated herself to that end. Some would argue that not all women marry, but instead pursue a career, and that maybe true of some, and indeed, if that be the case, a copious knowledge is highly valued and beneficial in any field.

Our entire lives should be devoted to seeking God's will for our lives and learning to serve and please Him with every ounce of our being whether married or single. Young unmarried girls generally find it easier to find time to spend in God's Word, not having the responsibilities of running a home on their own, and if they train themselves to be in the habit of having a daily quiet time, it is more natural to continue the habit when they are married. In every aspect of our lives we are faced with a choice to honor God or to dishonor Him, whether in pursuing academics, helping with chores, interacting with others, or anything else that consumes our time. We are responsible to act in a Christlike manner, but how are we to do that in tough situations if we have not trained ourselves to do so at home?

A majority of Christian young ladies have lost the vision for what they should be doing after high school graduation, assuming it is not promptly followed by marriage. For some, college awaits, while for others, they plan to stay home, but as to what should occupy their time, they are lost. It is time this bridge were crossed and time for the older women to instruct, teach, and help younger women to prepare for things they cannot themselves envision, as Paul instructs them to do in Titus. Having never tread the waters of married life, many girls prepare for a wedding more than a marriage, and picture married life being nearly as perfect and romantic as fairy tales would have us to believe. There is a reason fairy tales stop right after the wedding; married life is so different from what single girls think it to be. The silk and cake are replaced by aprons and dish towels; and the real life begins. How much easier it would be for the young ladies of our culture to transition from their role of daughter into that of wife if she had spent time learning and preparing for her life long calling.

* In My Father's House. Tamara and Naomi Valine. Lily Press. 2004.